At a certain point, though, you gotta look at how far you’ve come. I used to dream of being like this back when my family first moved to Chicago. Now I just dream of what’s to come.
Fuck, I can barely focus on this now, it’s been a marathon. This is forever in the making, a form of expression I’ve been waiting for. Who else do you know doing stuff like this? Who else is doing this? I’m just waiting for a peer, so I can collaborate or compare. Right now, I’m out on my own.
I told that little homie that asks for advice that he should start doing his own thing too. That he should start building his brand and portfolio, and that he should write in a way that makes sense to this new, strange world. I told him that I’ve been doing this on my own with no one I knew following suit for three years. Only now am I actually doing what I’ve been wanting to do.
As I sit back, leaning on my couch that I bought on Gay Street a month or so back for $10, shit seems glorious. So many friends I’ve had around the world, and I’m at least making something. Got buddies back in California that burnt out, started taking shit to the head way too early and got fucked up. They’re talking about community college when we used to compete, toe-to-toe, to be the smartest and most athletic kid in elementary school. My fall back plan is a finance degree from NYU Stern. Somehow, it all worked out.
I don’t have troubles talking to girls like I used to. Back to the days just outside Chicago when I was paralyzed by fears of fucking up, or looking stupid. Now, I just get faded and roll on out, take them to Café Habana for a nice date on Elizabeth Street. Some of them aren’t gonna like hearing that I’m following a game plan, or that I don’t put any more thought into it than that. It’s about quality over quantity. I tell all my homies that, but some are still too interested in mass quantity. That’s them though, and they’re my brothers regardless.
Anyways, that’s it, and thanks for sticking around. At the end of it all, all this is just a process of growth.
And I’m just lucky because, damn, I feel like Mr. Wonderful.
